Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
