no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
