I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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