Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
this hospital has no fireball
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
