dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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