is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize