you turned your livingroom into a bong?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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