Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
