Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
