So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
