Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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