i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
