My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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