shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
