i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
