i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
