Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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