Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
