It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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