Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
