Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
