No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
