I heard we made out
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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