Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
