He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
