But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
