hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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