Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
love makes seman taste better
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
