Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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