I just made out with a guy for $7.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
