Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
