I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I was not drunk enough for that final.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
