How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
