You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
