Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
