I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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