idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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