This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You can't special order awesome
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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