I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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