thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
