Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
