Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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