I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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