Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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