My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
