Is it normal to miss your booty call?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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