Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
