Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
that may or may not have been my penis.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
