Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
so explain again why im purple
no
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Randomize
