I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
