dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
